Yes, Ann Coulter the right wing columnist who generally accuses Bill Clinton and all who voted for him of being communists and pretty much the same as terrorists. In her new book Ann charges that Democrats nearly caused us to lose the Cold War and that McCarthy was right and there really was a vast communist conspiracy in the government, but the communists won and brought him down. Plus all Democratic and liberal ideas are treason. What a lady. So I wrote this little ditty for her. Why...
...because I can.
Ann Coulter
(To the tune of "Gloria" by Laura Branigan)

Ann Coulter, you're not quite making sense now
Always after Clinton, you gotta get him somehow
I think you've got to slow down, before you start to blow it
I think you're headed for a breakdown, so be careful not to show it

You really don't remember, was it something Clinton said
Are the voices in your head calling Ann Coulter?
Ann Coulter, don't you think you're foolish?
If Joe McCarthy was right, why couldn't anybody prove it?
You don't have to answer
Just attack them all the time, oh-oh-oh calling them traitors
Ann Coulter (Ann Coulter) I think you just get dumber (Ann Coulter)
I think you're getting more bitter (Ann Coulter)
Cause you're not getting younger (Ann Coulter)
But you really don't remember, was it something Clinton said?
Are the voices in your head calling Ann Coulter?

A-ha-ha, A-ha-ha, Ann Coulter, How's it gonna go down?
Will you find him with Kim Jong-Il, or will you catch him with Bin Laden?
Will you blame him cause you're lonely
Say that Clnton caused your empty womb?
Feel you sanity slipping away, don't believe it's coming back soon

You really don't remember, was it someting clinton said?
Are the voices in your head, calling Ann Coulter?
Ann Coulter, don't you think you're foolish?
If McCarthy was right, why couldn't anybody prove it?
You don't have to answer
Just attack them all the time, oh-oh-oh, calling them traitors
Ann Coulter (Ann Coulter) I think you just get dumber (Ann Coulter)
I think you're getting more bitter (Ann Coulter)
Cause you're not getting any younger (Ann Coulter)
But you really don't remember, was it something Clinton said
Are the voices in your head, calling Ann Coulter

Ann Coulter, Ann Coulter, Ann Coulter...


And today only, our special bonus parody:

Ann Coulter
(To the tune of "Proud Mary" by Creedence Clearwater Revival)

Got a good job with no real work
Attacking liberals every night and day
But I never lost a minute of sleepin'
Worryin' bout the way the real world is

Big mouth it just keep flappin'
Ann Coulter keeps on yappin'
Hidin', hidin', hiding from the real world

Clinton was a commie liberal
Ignore what he did for the economy
But I never knew that liberals were all traitors
Til I stopped and read this lunatic queen
(chorus)

If women have careers not babies
Ann Coulter just calls them sick feminists
She don't have to worry though she's got no babies
Those who think like her just never get it
(Chorus)

Courtesy Mark Hoolihan and the Hoolinet
Copyright 2003 Boniface Bugle Productions. All Rights Absurd.


___________________________
Mark Hoolihan
Department of Communist Conspiracies and Feminist Chipmunks
Michigan State University
___________________________
"Well, I did want sex to be distributed equally among all"
_Bill Clinton's Manifesto